This is me aged minus ten months, as you can see, I've got a bit of a tan, but that's because my daddy used to work in the oil industry, where they use lots and lots of cuddly radiation.

I think I look a bit like Bruce Willis in Die Hard, only without the silly haircut and nasty vest. That's my mate Arnold at the bottom of the frame, he was a bit on the slow side (because I'd superglued his tail to one of those curly hair thingies) and that's why this is my little pink world and not his.

This is me about an hour later, as you can see I was an individualist even then. It's at times like this that I'm reminded of the old saying, "Which came first, the chicken or the egg?", stupid question eh? It was the cockrel.